THINGS MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME

[albalad]

1: My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"Your room looks like a hurricane went through it."

2: My mother taught me about RELIGION.
"You'd better pray that stain comes out of the carpet."

3: My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't behave I'll knock you into the middle of next week."

4: My mother taught me about OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your dinner."

5: My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of children in the world who don't have parents like you."

6: My mother taught me about GENEALOGY.
"Shut that door. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

7: My mother taught me about GIVING..
"I'll give you something to whine about in a minute."

12: My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You're going to get it when we get home."

8: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have children. I hope they turn out just like you."

9: My mother taught me about LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

10: My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit right there until your Brussels Sprouts are finished."

11: My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just you wait until you're father gets home."

12: My mother taught me about HUMAN ANATOMY.
"A shilling? Do you think I'm made of money?"


(Seriously - Mum and Dad were the best.)